Feb 28 2007

The most perfect cookie

You may think that your favorite Girl Scout Cookie is the Thin Mint, but I am here to tell you that you only think this because you have never tried the Lemonades--they're shortbread cookies dipped in lemon, and they are the most delicious cookie I've ever had. I could easily have eaten the whole box in one sitting--but Reuben had not yet experienced The Cookie, so I restrained myself, and only shared them with the few of my coworkers I actually like--which I now almost regret--I only bought one box. They're new this year and I didn't know if they were going to be any good--I certainly did not expect that they would be the most awesome cookie ever.

Next year I'm getting, like, ten. Seriously. If any of y'all see a girl scout selling cookies, pick up some of the Lemonades.

Feb 22 2007

Piled Higher and Deeper

This comic is absurdly, uncannily accurate.

phd comic 393

Here are some other great ones.
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=167
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=174
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=214
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=229
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=238
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=242
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=246
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=252
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=286
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=438
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=458
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=487
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=515
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=562
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=581
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=602
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=720
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=735
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=756
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=761
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=782
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=798
http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=813

Feb 21 2007

How could you possibly think I would care?

Does everyone have This Guy at work? The guy who has to tell you every. single. fucking. detail. of everything he does? Live! In real time! Because it's infuriating. It's one thing if you ask for my help with an issue--I have no problem rendering assistance if I'm not busy with anything else--but of course, This Guy would never ask for help. He is Smart Enough that he can Solve Any Problem Himself, evidence to the contrary notwithstanding. So it turns into an informational session, a briefing, on what he's doing. And how it's failing (because it must be impossible to fix, if he can't fix it!). So I walk over and fix it. And he comes back, five minutes later, to tell me how it's progressing, now that by sheer luck it seems to be functioning better.

I! Don't! Care!

Another coworker pointed out to our boss that the reason he does this to her--tells her in minute detail about his every action--because he used to work in an environment where that was not only encouraged but required (but he's worked here 7 years!)--but I'm not the boss of him. I could not conceivably have any interest in what he's working on nor how he's going about it. Except that he thinks he's so fucking smart and everything he does is so fucking fascinating that I must want to hear about it.

Well, I don't. So shut up. Go away. Leave me alone.

Feb 14 2007

Physics vs Powerpoint

Unfortunately, working in Physics means giving quite a few presentations. This would be bad enough, as it takes significant time away from experiments. But, adding to this, everyone uses PowerPoint. The program is wretched for this application.

For instance, say we want to display some kind of atomic structure. Atomic structures, if you don't know, are made up of atoms, which are normally drawn as spheres. Now, you would think that drawing a sphere in PowerPoint would be rather simple. Draw a circle, make it into a 3D object, voila, right?

Wrong. You get this:
cylinder

Now, I have seen presentations that included spheres. How can this be done? The thing about Powerpoint is that it isn't really a graphics program. It displays graphics, but it's not so good with generating them. The only straightforward way I found of making a sphere in Powerpoint is to
1. Find a suitable 3D picture of a sphere
2. Draw a circle
3. Map the image of the sphere onto the circle.

To make a 3D picture, I took an eps from BALSAC and stripped it down to only one ball by editing the PostScript manually (You can download the stripped version here) After changing the color (around line 184), I run it through epstopdf to make a vector-graphics pdf

> epstopdf ballgen.eps

and then through imagemagick to give me a high quality bitmap

> convert -trim -density 300 -geometry 50% -rotate 180 ballgen.pdf this_color.png

After which you can get this
atoms
which looks very nice.

This illustrates that the only really reliable way to use PowerPoint is to make it a program that only displays text and bitmaps. Any other scalable media, it invariably has major problems.

For instance, I used to like Tex4ppt, which purported to convert a PowerPoint text box with TeX code in it to a scalable equation in a native Microsoft format. However, many of the structures (notably integrals) would get horribly warped if you had any animations. The solution? A Perl script which takes TeX equations and renders them as high quality PNG files. These are then added to PowerPoint as bitmaps, which it won't screw up. (Code for this is here. Requires Perl and Imagemagick, naturally.)

PowerPoint is probably great if all your graphs are in Excel, all your equations look good enough to you in MS Equation Editor, and you don't draw anything other than flow charts. For us working in science, though, it's a fucking nightmare.

Feb 10 2007

Mystery

Last night the weirdest thing happened to me--I was mostly asleep in the bed, and all of a sudden I was awake and the bed seemed to be vibrating. I thought maybe it was a really small earthquake, but it didn't really seem like one, and it seemed to stop when I picked up my head to look around. Frickin odd.

So I was telling Reuben about it, and he brought up something I had completely forgotten--that he used to bitch about this phenomenon all the time when we still had our old mattress, and would make me get up so he could shove it back into position (the mattress tended to slide off the box spring, which he thought might be causing the vibration). Well, that's not it; the new mattress doesn't slide, and yet he still experiences the vibrating--though he hasn't woken me up complaining about it.

I always used to think he was completely fucking nuts, with the vibrating bed thing. Now I know--we're both completely fucking nuts. Or the bed is vibrating for some mysterious and annoying reason.

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